I guess I should start at the beginning. Although, that really doesn't present him in the best light...
Two years ago, I had just gotten out of a semi-long term relationship with BritBoy. We had been together for 8 months and I thought I was in love with him. In reality, looking back, it was more co-dependency than love. There were some fun times: he took me to Europe (he was British), we took a road trip to Canada, I celebrated his 21st birthday with him. Pause, yes he was quite a bit younger than I, should have known then! Needless to say, he ended up the relationship in order to get back together with his ex-girlfriend. To this day I choose to not think about the whole cheating aspect that was the end of our relationship (on his part not mine!).
Since I was single again, and had still never dated anyone in the same faith as me, my parents got me a subscription to JDate - an online dating service for Jewish singles. I had spoken with a few men. Gone out on a few dates. Nothing really noteworthy. I don't remember who sent the first email (it was a long time ago!) but I found myself chatting with a guy, let's name him Archie Law, who I thought had a very attractive photo. He had gone to school for Architecture and was currently in Law school (get the name now? Ha, I crack myself up sometimes). We decided to meet and watch a movie the night before NYE (so that would have been NYE 2009).
On my drive to his house that night I remember being really nervous. Was this the right thing to do? I had only seen one picture of him, what if I wasn't attracted to him? What if he was a serial killer? Yes, these are all things that I thought. I showed up, he opened the door, and I immediately felt relieved. He was adorable, just my type! I won't bore you with the details, but that turned out to be the longest first date in the history of the world. I stayed the night (no judgements please), and the next night (yes NYE), and for a third.
We continued to "date" - I use the term very loosely - for maybe a month. I was getting antsy and wanted to define it, etc etc. He had just gotten out of a 4 year relationship and was in no hurry to jump into another one. I had also suspected he was "dating" other woman, I had asked him a few times - more like nagged - he denied it. Long story short, I convinced myself that he was sleeping with other people. This from an open IM window he left on his laptop when he went to the bathroom. He has his own reasons that he wanted to stop contact with me. And thus, we just stopped speaking with each other. And for the next two years I would fondly refer to him as Asshole Architect.
Fast forward to this past December - two years after we met. I resigned on to JDate just to see who was around. Almost immediately a window popped up saying that Archie Law wanted to chat. I was thinking, Oh great what does this ass want, no really I was! We briefly caught up on life, etc. And that was that. The next weekend I had a Christmas party at my neighbors house. They were all asking about MrGrizz and when would I complete my degree, it was torture! I ended up imbibing a wee bit too much. Next thing I knew I texted AL - I had never deleted his number. We texted back and forth for almost an hour when my phone started ringing. He was calling me... but why?! We ended up chatting until 4 am that morning, I was very sober by the end! And decided to meet for lunch after his finals were over in a few days. We continued to text throughout those days, then it was finally Tuesday...
I drove up to his house - nervous and feeling like I shouldn't be making this mistake again - and as soon as I saw him I knew I was in trouble. That attraction was there instantly, while it felt like 2 years ago, I knew I was much older and wiser than my former self. We had a lovely lunch. Decided to relive our first date by watching a movie. The same movie has chance had it. And the same thing resulted. I did not go home that night.
This time I played it cool though! We were both on holiday break, and ended up seeing a lot of each other the next week. He came out with my family for our normal Christmas Eve dinner of Chinese food. Between Christmas and NY he was in NY and I was in DC visiting my grandmother. But we reconnected for NYE when I joined him for a wedding up in the Poconos. That was a disastrous weekend!!! Completely and 100% due to me. I may or may tell you all about it. After NYE, he was in CO for a week, I went back to work. Then I went to LA for work. It was an insane amount of traveling. We spoke occasionally while we were both away and would reconnect when we were both in the same area code.
Finally a few weeks ago the traveling was done. We now talk everyday. He calls. We text. We hang out. We do sleepovers. This is no longer dating, this is basically a relationship. I'm nervous. But excited. I'm petrified of getting hurt. I can honestly say that I know I could fall in love with him. Which frightens me to no end. I am trying to put the past in the past. I know there are no other girls now. I need to learn to trust him. To trust anyone.
I guess we will see where this goes... I have high hopes :)
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